1. When in, about or around West "By God" Virginia thou shall watcheth and waiteth for the most opportuneth Tudors Biscuit World. Driving down the road I get a feeling that I should have gone to Tudors yesterday.....
(John Denver - Country Roads)
2. Keep on eye out for the good, the bad and the ugly of the license plate world. Vanity plates are so vain!
(Carly Simon- You're So Vain)
3. Never, I repeat, NEVER underestimate the necessity of good road snacks. Hot sausage and mustard, or while were in the mood, cold jelly and custard!
(Olive Soundtrack- Food Glorious Food)
(Cab Calloway- Everybody Eats When You Come to My House)
4. Sharp eyes and savvy nostrils will keep your road kill count top notch. 1,2,3,4,5,6 road kill, road kill!
(Modern Lovers- Roadrunner)
5. Every good road dog knows:
Vultures fly high,
weather never better.
Vulchers fly low,
shoulda brought ya sweater!
(Martha and the Vandellas- Heat Wave)
6. When en route don't forget your music to boot! Without ear candy your ride could get weeeiiird.
(Greatful Dead- Truckin')
(Aaron Tippin- There Ain't Nothing Wrong With The Radio)
7. Never underestimate the square footage of your cab. You can probably fit another person ad their dog.
(Marvin Gaye- Hitch Hike)
(Roger Miller- Me and Bobby McGee)
8. Be kind to your toll booth workers, its hard out there for a little shrimp. Nine words can save a life.
(Rolling Stones- (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction)
9. ROAD FRIENDS BEWARE!!! Coffee induced maniacal delirium is a very real condition. It will tae you up and it will bring you down. I believe Merle said it best, "you are always on top of a mountain when you fall!"
(Descendants- Coffee Mug)
(Bach- Schweigt stille, plaudert nicht) (translated to Be still, stop chattering)
10. As your round the corner and realize that your epic journey is about to come to a well deserved end, revel in the blood, sweat, tears and bottles of energy drinks you put into your trek. Arrive with a BANG!!!
(Europe- The Final Countdown)
This was certainly creative! My favorite "rule of the road" was the quote from The Final Countdown. It was great seeing snippets from songs I liked, especially the Carly Simon song, since it was mentioned in class. The title of the poem made me giggle too. I agree that you should never underestimate the necessity of good road snacks!
ReplyDeleteOn second glance, this works better for me. I think that the citations threw me off, but the advice itself is kooky and enjoyable (mostly). Some of it is still inside-jokey, but I think if you intend this to be something like "Follow These 10 Rules and a Great Road Trip is Guaranteed" and then you parody the language of guide books, this could be really successful.
ReplyDeleteSome easily avoidable mistakes herein. Bee more carefuller!
Dave