Thursday, May 17, 2012

"Let Them Play Euchre!!"

"Let them eat cake!"...ugh,
Why is that such an offensive suggestion?
Cake surely is a wonderful treat
for a frenchmen,
Is it not?

I could have been cruel and said
"Let them eat gruel!"
"Slop for dinner!"
Heaven forbid,
"Let them eat chopped liver!"
Ohh, I do despise that dish

Truly I do care for these
pathetic peasants but,
It would truly be a travesty if
I am remembered for my
Culinary curtness and not my
overwhelming beauty and grace.

What exactly do these
demanding demons want anyway?
My money?
My jewels?
Obviously they don't want my baker,
My castles?
My wit?
I'd gladly give my candlestick maker.

I suppose I know what they truly want,
But they are not going to get it.
The crown off my head via the neck,
It is just not in the cards for me to end neckless.

......mmhmm...card, playing cards...EURIKA!

An old french saying states
"An idol hand sews the devils seed",
The guillotine certainly must be manufactured by
Lucifer himself who is a known employer of
Idol hands to do his dirty deeds.

Those who utilize that bloody blade and
indenture their idly infected hands to do dirty work
Need something new to do with their itchy fingers.
I propose a jovial game of euchre!

Many are the days I have spent
In the afternoon sun
Sipping lemon water and
playing euchre to my hearts delight.

If my rabid people could only
focus on the delight of the game and
focus less on their petty complaints
things could be going much smoother for us all.

With my new stroke of genius
I will surely be remembered for my
Tact and gracious people skills!

Yes, yes, yes.  That is it.
Gather the crowds and tell them
I have something to say
"LET THEM PLAY EUCHRE!!!!!"

1 comment:

  1. As I said in class, I really like this draft. You did more than merely caricature M.A. Sure, there's the pompous voice, but you get the imagined insecurity, the lack of self-awareness, and the heretofore undiscovered love of euchre.

    I guess the big question is, Is the inclusion of euchre just a lark? Is it just that it's funny to imagine an historical figure inventing euchre? Or is there more to it?

    Dave

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